I am reading the most amazing book, The Wisdom of Yoga by Stephen Cope, (thanks for the lend Susan!) In it, he discusses the awareness we all have. This awareness brings the mind back to center during meditation. He calls it a number of things, I like to think of it as an observer, and the observer is me.

Tonight, during a heated power class, I tried to access the observer. I have done this before, but never with significant engagement. But for some reason, during an extensive balancing series, with thighs burning and sweat dripping, I consciously shifted to an unattached focus. I let go.  Attachment to my experience released, along with tension and worry. I felt, if not quite peace, a grounding and acceptance. 

It is a continual amazement to me that so much can happen on my mat. In this little 2×7 foot space I experience an intense internal dialogue. The fighting and pulling, negotiating and deal making that happens in my head would be enough to fill a half- hour sitcom. I see now that this connection to the observer is a way to help lose this drama on the mat!

Getting back to class, I worked! My body worked! And on this morning’s run, I FELT my thighs. It was sort of mark of success, and I didn’t get hung up there. I just ran on.